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Sydnei Kaplan, author /Photo by Nina Uhlíková from Pexels

As a mom of two college kids, I have a birds-eye view of this blessed journey we call Motherhood. It touches each mom in unique ways. 

Some may feel profoundly altered as if they were shaken up and settling back into place in a brand new way. Others have described this transition as a rebirth. Many have been stunned by the complete shift in focus from self-to-others. 

The possibilities are endless, but none of us emerge unaffected, and the changes continue throughout this incredible journey. 

Motherhood’s effect on me was and still is, very powerful. It has been life-changing in the best ways. 

From my vantage point, with many years and priceless memories tucked in my heart, I know with a comforting certainty that Motherhood is forever – it doesn’t stop at a certain age or stage. 

It evolves and grows with us. 

Facing the “growing up” of my children forced me to look deep within myself. To explore the next steps on my path.

We had waited some years after we were married to become parents. Those years were filled with work, friends, travel, and lots of “just us” time (which I loved). This was joyful, and it was comfortable. I also thought I loved my job, but in hindsight, I realize I mostly loved the people. It was comfortable. I liked my work (marketing and writing) but never fully felt it was my calling. 

Sydnei and family

Even though I had beautiful friendships and a loving marriage, there was a sense of insecurity deep within me that had followed me from my teen years. I’m guessing some of you know what I mean. You can be a happy, confident person but still have doubts within you that affect how you live your life.

Motherhood changed that for me. It was, and continues to be, healing in the most perfect of ways. It didn’t happen in any particular moment, like when I first held Mia or when Ben made me the mom of two. There wasn’t a specific accomplishment that made me say “aha” – like when I traveled home on a plane from our first family vacation, without my husband, and with 3-year-old Mia and not-yet-1 Ben. 

This healing – finding myself – has been a journey. It’s been a compilation of the many moments of being a mama. 

Sydnei enjoying life as it comes

More importantly, I began seeing myself in a refreshing new light. Really it was more of a subtle feeling—yet so empowering. I noticed myself feeling less dependent on others to feel happy, capable, or complete.

Through my children, I began sensing not only what I had to offer but who I truly was. 

Some steps were effortless, like starting to work in a preschool—nurturing and supporting the blossoming of little ones had always come naturally to me. 

Other pursuits, like venturing into the world of Motherhood writing, took a little more nudging. My family participated in this “nudging” in various ways — offering encouragement, sharing other’s blogs as examples to inspire me, and just continuing to be who they are and reminding me of the exquisite blessing that Motherhood is. 

So here I am, always a work in progress—feeling a renewed sense of excitement and purpose. Not only from writing, but also from the exceptional people who have come into my life because of it. 

It’s never too late to discover YOUR other passions. You will always be Mom, but there’s a world of possibility waiting for you to shine your own special light. 

Article By Ali Flynn/Photo by Andre Furtado from Pexels

After many years of feeling drained as a partner and a mom, I decided to take my life back and stop going through the motions…

At some point, I lost a bit of myself along the way of raising my children.

I let go of my passions and only focused on what made my children happy.
And the funny thing is, I didn’t even know it.

Until years later, upon deep reflection, I realized the loss I was feeling.

I let go of me.

I stopped living for me and only woke up each day wondering how to make the lives of the people around me more fulfilled.

I let go of me.

I started to become a shell of a person simply going through the motions rather than living life each day. Even before the pandemic of Covid-19, I felt I was living day after day the same life over and over again.

I let go of me.

I didn’t wake up refreshed, ready to take on the day, rather I was tirelessly traipsing through the day with little to no emotion.

I let go of me.

I was trapped inside my own shell, knowing the walls to escape could be broken down but no one could reach in and help me.

I let go of me.

I had to emerge on my own…

And that, my friends, is exactly what I did.

I reached deep into my soul and pulled out the old wounds and dealt with them face to face.

I slowly started to find me.

I gently traveled to the parts that I had been missing, brushed myself off while being wrapped in a warm embrace and invited myself back in again.

I slowly started to find me again.


I essentially stopped living life going through the motions.

I slowly started to find me again.

I started living and I let go of the guilt.

I let go of the looming thoughts that burdened me.
I stopped feeling selfish the times I was making myself happy.

I started living for my family as a whole.

Not just living for my husband.
Not just going about my day for my children.
But for me also.
For the first time, I was living for all of us collectively.

I slowly started to find me again.

Life has not changed drastically.
But how I look at my life has been altered.

Each day I am presented with decisions to make and I am living within the decisions, feeling each and every part of the day.

I am not going through the motions filling a void in the hollow of the shell that once existed

And oh, what a blessing it has been.

I found me! 

 

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